Chasing oblivion

A youngblood's rants

Archive for the tag “journal”

Chapter 1. The Start of an End

So today marks the countdown to my last days with Lucifer. As a friend put it, It’s been a long time coming.

Finally, I’m starting to break out of these shackles I’ve been on in for the last 3 years. Yes, read it right! 3 years with my none other than Satan-came-to-the-world-to-wreck-havoc-and-misery-to-humankind boss. Needless to say, I hate him, and he hates me back. So I guess, there’s one thing we definitely agree on.

The day started out as always, me waking up to the sound of my rooster alarm clock, me embracing my multiple personality disorder by arguing if I should get up or call in sick, and deciding otherwise, haggling again with myself if I could perhaps come in late. But today, my society-thinks-the-better half of me won over the delinquent-useless-depressed-burnt out me. 8am I was in the office, working on some final touches on my presentation that day, which I intentionally forgot to finish yesterday as a sign of protest for the hours of insult I received that day. By 8.30am, whole office began filling up even as the Daily prayer went on which signaled the start of a workday. For most of us at least, for us, it’s the start of our 8-hr encounter with the devil himself, 8-hr at least.

First hour starts out with our Daily huddle, which means at least 5 minute update, 30 minutes re-establishment of THE group vision albeit a little different each time, an hour of fault finding, and insults, which I may add seems to have no time limit. Today was no different (It’s only different whenever he is not around). I was again the centerpiece of his creation, telling me how I should come over to him to discuss items with him so he never has to disapprove everything that goes on his table. NOT. Unexpectedly, his daily dose had some special ingredient today, he praised and applauded two of our new colleagues because of a job well done because they always came to him for advice, calling them ignorant-no good-kids but magically turned perfect with the wave of his hand. Translation: I do not need you to think, I need you to do what I think.

Issue No 1: He does not need employees who could think for themselves, he needs extensions of his arms and god-knows-what-else. He needs pawns and soldiers, not tacticians, not strategists. Do not think. Just follow orders. 

How can I be okay with that? But yes, I get the point. So I just had to bear with it, get this daily grind over with so I could do my job. Only that my presentation is next on my daily calendar and he would still be with me. I got on it just fine. And there, as expected comes the blow. Talking to another, knowing I could clearly hear them, he drops the bomb. “This would not have finished had you not called to follow up and I sat with it” Isnt it obvious? 1. YOU are the approving authority so I guess of course, strategies will be finished if you step forward. 2. No one actually wants to talk to you and wouldn’t do so until the last minute and 3. People hate you.

Then time for lunch. We decided to take a breather and have lunch on one of the two fancier restaurants in the building, and the deal breaker on which one? That, where Lucifer was not on. Cut us some slack, will you?

Afternoon, he had a meeting until 5 pm. In between, he called me up to finish something which we both knew was not yet well established as communications and consultations are still to be made, but I indulged him, because in my head, I did not want any drama or so I thought. I should’ve known better, drama is what gets him off. So drama it is. Another round and he got his 2nd orgasm of the day. Now, my turn.

I gave him my pre-resignation teaser. Idea is breaking in with a soft blow. Give him time to think. Get him to ask around. Let him wallow in his own idea of self-righteousness. Eight months from now, I will be going on a Masters degree on full on-board scholarship in an international university for a year and a half. Unexpected, I said since I did not have the best grades in college. Just some luck I guess (after all, no one is good enough but him – that’s me trying to feed his ego). Told him what was covered, what my course was about, and being him him. He ought compelled to have the last words, gave some piece of advice, and while at it, I saw a hint that it finally hit him. This was my way out, end of my labyrinth, the start of a countdown. He sounded supportive though, why would he not be if he could get rid of me in the best possible way? Good for his ego, good for public perception. Perhaps, I’m letting him out so easily but I no longer care. I believe THAT quote where being happy and successful is the best revenge. I think I won this round, and on an advantage really. After all, I am on a track he can only dream of having, talk about possibilities and opportunities! And thus begins my last days with Lucifer.

Post Navigation